Saying goodbye to last year

2015 seemed to be the year of many goodbyes. Said goodbye to Giulia living with us as she had to go back home to Italy.. Said goodbye to my gram this past year. My papa and I were her main caretakers these last few years and I miss her terribly. And finally said goodbye to what my future was supposed to look like. But it was also the year of beautiful moments filled with hello's. I welcomed my son Seth into this world and gained some beautiful new friends. I have had to dig deep and find this inner strength that has had to sit on the back burner for a while now. I found my own apartment and a good job to support Seth and I. I am not entirely sure what the new year will bring as a divorce is in my future but I do know this to be true :

1) even when I have weakness Heavenly Father is there for me. And he will be my strength . 

2) Seth will always be the constant reminder of true unconditional love and the best part of me. 

3) family and true friends are irreplaceable and needed in all situations. 

4) I will rise from the ashes of my problems and conquer this year head on. 

I want to thank those friends who picked up the phone when I called in tears needing a friend. To mike and Maureen for taking me in when I had no where else to go with Seth. For all those meals cooked and movie nights filled with laughter instead of being lonely and wallowing in self pity. And to my parents and siblings and papa.. For taking me in, making sure I knew what steps to take, to making sure I know I am still loved so deeply and this was simply a bump in the road at times rather then a full road block. 

Am I enough

This Sunday's relief society lesson really had me thinking "am I enough" "am I doing all I can to live my life closer to Heavenly Father" "do I feel loved unconditionally by him and Jesus Christ" 

I haven't posted in a while so those who still continue to read...thank you! September was a tough month for me and it hasn't gotten any easier. I was told I was no longer loved by my husband and asked to leave. Divorce is never something I thought would be in my plans and I know Heavenly Father doesn't necessarily want marriages to end up in a divorce. Why am I again sharing this all? Because not one have I stopped going to church. Not once have I stopped knowing that my Heavenly Father loves me. I know my son loves me unconditionally and this hasn't and won't change. (Ok maybe when he reaches the teenage years he may have some angst but he will always still love me)

I have struggled so much being a single mom at church too. But days I literally am on the verge of tears and want to go home after first hour , I am surprised by friends who lend a helping hand with my son and a thoughtful ear for me. They hold him so I can sneak to the bathroom etc. That happened this past Sunday. Was visiting my old ward and my sons dad didn't pack enough clothes and so we thought we would be ok. Well my son owed right through the diaper and onto my best friend. I panicked and luckily had a shirt in my car. Sadly it was the coldest weekend NY has had in a long time and I just felt defeated. 

Boom enter into relief society and I left in tears. These last two and a half months I could have said it's easier to not go to church, easier to not struggle each week with my sons schedule and just relax at home Sunday's. But I do it for both of us. I do it because I still see blessings daily in our lives and want to give thanks. I do it because one day Seth may thank me for giving up so much and laying the foundation for him. I hope his wife will look back one day and appreciate his passion for faith and see that she too can do it every Sunday, and heck everyday. 

I am enough. I am enough to Seth. I am enough to my friends and family. And I am enough for Heavenly Father. 

Returning to Faith

This is the title of a church magazine article from the Ensign Magazine. It's by Rosemary M. Wixom (primary general president) and it really touched me yesterday in Relief Society(the women's meeting during our third hour of church) there I was dressed up with my son in his car seat in a brand new Ward. Nervous, anxious and wondering if my experience would be one of what I had at a different Ward where I was made uncomfortable. (And that is almost never the case with our church) Instead all morning I was talked too and greeted. And someone on the Bishopric even invited my son and I to dinner with him and his family.  The teacher was wonderful and had many of us sisters read different quotes from the article. Here are some I loved: 

"God guides you, dear Mother; you are not so much in the dark as you think. The path to be followed may not always be clear at once. Pray for light; do not decide too quickly, listen to what others have to say, consider their reasons. You will always find something to help you. … Guided by faith, by prayer, and by reason with a right intention, you have enough.”

“But He does not leave you when you have questions. When anyone tries to keep the commandments, the door is wide open. Prayer and scripture study became incredibly important.”

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland has said, “Humility, faith, and the influence of the Holy Spirit [will] always be elements of every quest for truth.”

“Here are truths I love. I can still bear testimony. I will just say those things that I know and trust. It may not be a perfect offering of knowledge, but it will be my offering. What I focus on expands inside of me. It is beautiful to get back to the essence of the gospel and feel clarity.”

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland: “Hold fast to what you already know and stand strong until additional knowledge comes.”

And finally it closed with referencing a primary song entitled a Child's Prayer. 

Lyrics:

1. 1. Heavenly Father, are you really there?
   And do you hear and answer ev'ry child's prayer?
   Some say that heaven is far away,
   But I feel it close around me as I pray.

   Heavenly Father, I remember now

   Something that Jesus told disciples long ago:

   "Suffer the children to come to me."

   Father, in prayer I'm coming now to thee.
2. 2. Pray, he is there;
   Speak, he is list'ning.
   You are his child;
   His love now surrounds you.
   He hears your prayer;
   He loves the children.
   Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of heav'n.
   
   
   
   
   The discussion really focused on helping those who have maybe lost their way or were on their way to questioning. And the teacher asked what could we do for those people. I then spoke up and said "say hello, you never know just how much that means to another person. I have felt so welcome here today and it's because so many said hello. I am going through a rough time and while I don't doubt my faith I doubt my own strength."  
   
   
   I have been having some transitions here in my life that maybe one day will be another blog but until then just know I will "doubt my doubts before I doubt my faith"
3. 
   

Being called out...

Let me say I was called out in a good way! Every first Sunday at our Ward we have time to get up and share our testimony. Since attending a new Ward I haven't been 109% comfortable getting up and speaking in front of the much larger group. After all I went from a small Ward where everyone knows everyone to the largest in the Stake. So when it came time during Relief Society I knew I had to share. But again anxiety gets the best of me and I could not get up on my own. However I kept hearing this voice saying I needed to share. A few sisters mentioned how when they pray they may get a few different answers depending on what they ask. Those answers can range from a "yes,not right now and no something else is planned" so I wanted to share but was to nervous. Earlier before thenhournstsrted the President of Relief Society met me and was so sweet! So I should have known that Heavenly Father would have her get up at the end and have me share. She got up from her seat and there I thought "ok I am home free. Maybe next month." And she said she wanted to have me introduce myself and share with the group if I wanted. I then told her how I felt like I really needed to share but didn't and thought I almost got away with not sharing. But His plan was clearly different! I shared briefly how I lost Matthew and for years I prayed to Heavenly Father for another child. And I knew it was a not right now answer. And finally with my son Seth who was in his car seat next to me I said " I finally got my answer and it was now. 5 months ago when he was born."  I feel like Heavenly Father knew I needed to share with these sisters that even after years of waiting I still had this faith and my prayers had come true. I was also feeling so strongly after a lesson on the Mustard seed verses from the bible. 

"And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you." Matthew 17:20

 This verse is something I think of so often. I even have a beautiful necklace with an excuse mustard seed in it with a charm saying where to find the bible verse (ie Matthew 17:20) I named my first born Matthew and whenever I wear this necklace I know that at one point I questioned my faith but I was able to turn to Heavenly Father and never be left alone. I was still loved and watched over. My faith has grown so much. And now attending church just down the road from where my church was created is incredible! We know and believe that Heavenly Father and Jesus came to Joseph Smoth in a vision in the Sacred Grove. I get to see the grove every week. I will never stop appreciating this beautiful gift. I went to the Sacred Grove Sunday as a family and it was great bringing my son there to experience it all. This picture was on a bench in the middle of the Sacred Grove! 

And this picture was take outside of the Snith Fanily Farmhouse with our two Elder friends. (Elder Coffey and Elder Keller) 

In conclusion (yes I know high school teachers HATE when ending anything in the last paragraph with "in conclusion") do not be afraid to speak up. Because Heavenly Father may send his message for you to speak up though someone else. Don't stop having faith ..ever. 

Charity

So this was the topic at our gospel principles class yesterday. This morning I am watching the WE day program that was on last week. For those who are wondering what that is..it's a program where they highlight amazing kids and people who do so much can for others. One story that had me in tears was a girl and her mom going to Kenya and experiencing a water walk. Realizing that gathering water several times a day demonized chances to further their educations. They then brought this experience back to their community and had their own walks for water to raise awareness and funds to help those millions without access to clean drinking water. 

Another story that I loved was a 12 year old girl adopted from China who during surgeries on her cleft pallet wanted a teddy bear or something to comfort her she now donates stuffed animals to hospitals and places like fried rations and the local ambulance.  For those who don't know me personally... The firehouse is our second home. Our second family. Andrew is a volunteer firefighter and I have always been in the ladies Auxillary. But I've also helped with cleaning the trucks for annual inspections(when 9 months pregnant mind you)  helped make coffee and cocoa for the guys and girls after late nights and early mornings. We also have helped recruit and do festivals in our community together. We love serving and doing charity. So the stories of this particular program really spoke to me. 

Charity was first shown to us through Christ. He was sent to Earth to love selflessly and help anyone and everyone. 

He helped those who no one else would help. This is something I often think about. He even gave himself up to be crucified for the salvation of everyone. This is beyond incredible. 

What can we do to be charitable to others. Never mind the tax breaks of charity or the other material benefits. Do it to be completely altruistic. Do it when no one else will. Help others when no one else will. 

Fun things about my church

As many of you may or may not know the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is a church like any other. The people are almost always nice and go out of their way to help anyone. Some things I've noticed even while visiting other wards(church buildings) is that if you lean forward a family member is almost always there to rub your back. Children have activities to keep them busy typically and they are in the main chapel with everyone else. Women get a chance to be on the stand as well and give talks. This isn't common among every faith and I personally love it. In fact you typically never hear from the same person two weeks in a row. You hear new people talk all of the time. This keeps perspectives fresh and many listeners interested in waits being said every Sunday. The Bishop, our local church leader, meets with people during the second and third hour of our church sessions. I personally love being able to get to meet with him.

We have one of the biggest relief supports in the world. We are always helping with service and others. Be sure to check out a Ward on a Sunday!  

Don't judge challenge

So another social media fad is happening  right now. It's entitled the Don't Judge Challenge. Many social media outlets highlight videos of individuals with lipstick all over there face, drawn on unibrows, drawn on pimples and glasses with messed up hair. They then transform into their normal everyday look..makeup done right, hair done and no glasses. Don't forget the perfect teeth and outfit. Now before researching this I just watched the countless videos and I have to say I don't get the appeal. You are showing a before and after and clearly changing how you are. (Appearance wise) why not do a no makeup challenge and show inner beauty? Why not highlight beauty marks and show off unique qualities that you may have been born with etc? We were all created in HIS image. Therefore we are all beautiful. Let's celebrate it instead of creating 6 second videos where one looks one way and then the final result is something totally different. Why change what you look like for any reason? Why do the lip challenge to make your lips look like one "celebrity"?

Love yourself for who you are. Dare to be different and stick out for the right reasons. Speak up for others when no one else will. That's a challenge I am willing to take. Whose with me???!!!!

Praying as a parent

Now that I have a little one in the home I find myself praying more and more everyday. Usually it's please Heavenly Father let him sleep for 5 more minutes...please let me shower without him getting fussy. Can I please have more of these little moments?! I pray and give thanks for him so much that Heavenly Father I'm sure puts the phone down and walks away while I am still talking and thanking him!(totally just kidding and showing off my sense of humor) I have never been so in love with someone. He is literally created from myself and my husband...how amazing! I can see him grow everyday and I am so thankful for this. 

I pray my son knows unconditional love always.

I pray he is happy in life.

I pray he finds someone to love and gets the chance to get sealed in our churches temple like my husband and I have done.

I pray he strives to do his best in his education.

I pray for him to treat others the way he wants to be treated. 

I pray for him to grow spiritually and love church.

As a parent what do you pray for? Do you remember to give thanks? It's important to be thankful just as much if not more each time we ask for something too. 

10 days

So before I tell you what is happening in 10 days lets rewind to about three years ago. I had just lost a pregnancy as many of you know and at 5 months of pregnancy I was not looking forward to having an empty nest after my due date. After a long discussion with Andrew we decided to become foreign exchange host parents. We initially thought about fostering but at the time the process was much longer and I simply did not want to spend much more time with just Andrew and myself. Granted I love the man but we married to have a family and have our home filled with many people and many memories. (Today we host exchange students and are foster parents!)

Our first student hailed from Belgium and I often talk about him because his name was Mathieu, and we named our angel Matthew. Now if that isn't a huge sign from Heavenly Father I don't know what is!! After he left we took a year off and we moved back to NY.  We were approached by the exchange program to host again and we jumped at the chance. This time I wanted to host a girl. We found the most perfect person to make our house a home! Her name was Giulia and she was from Italy. She knew Andrew and I wanted to have a baby and so her year may be interesting if it ended up becoming a reality. She was forwarned we were members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and we didn't drink coffee or alcohol. And still she braved the long flights and came to our family. Right before her arrival my dreams came true and we were certified foster parents and just found out we were expecting again. 

She dealt with my crazy pregnancy emotions which usually consisted of me crying at every show and just eating ice cream and any other food craving I had. (Egg rolls and McDonald's chicken nuggets mostly..and never together!eww)

She was there for our sons birth and has helped us out so much with him.

I know she was put in our family for a reason. She helped us the weekend we needed to be with my great gran. She died in May just before my son hit one month of age and I needed to almost be in two places at once. Well there Giulia was, helping us with Seth so I could be with my gram in her final days. Being able to do that not only made me happy but a lot of the out of state family who could not be there were happy that she was not alone. 

Giulia will be leaving us in ten days(ergo the title of this post) I know you may read this and not believe it when I say it but you were placed in our family for a reason. I love you so very much and I consider you one of my closest friends. I appreciate you always being open to my faith and coming to church with us when asked. This was important to us as well when looking for a good fit for our family. We didn't need them to be a member of our church but we wanted them to at least come once or twice when we asked. Giulia has been opening to meeting all of our crazy missionary friends and answered all of their questions. She every attended a blessing for our son. 

Our son loves her so much. Even now at just ten weeks she can make him smile and calm down. She even took him to her senior ball. We dressed him up and bought her flowers from him to give to her. I think it's something she will remember forever. Today I had the two of them taking pictures. I told her they were for my husband since Father's Day is tomorrow. Once I got some great photos of them I had them come to the back of the fireball where I had her friends and family hidden for a surprise party. It was so great having her friends all come out and spend more time together. Even my close friend Maureen doesn't know how she will survivor without Giulia. I guess more then one family needed Giulia in their lives this year. 

I urge everyone to take the time to appreciate every minute of every day and just know that it's a gift. I've been so lucky to have Giulia in my life. And now she is stuck with me. 

Evolving relationships

So there's is this news article circulating through my news feed on Facebook. A title basically saying I'm a mom and yes I'm a bad friend.(or something almost word for word) I read it intrigued to what really made this new mom a terrible friend. I gave the writer a fair unbiased chance but by the end I was more upset I think. In the article it said those who don't have kids don't want to have your children shoved in your face and when you call that friend they don't want to hear you talking to little Joey in the background telling him to get down off the counter etc. My best friend has two little ones and when I call her o know she does the best she can listening to me and managing watching her children. I give her so much credit for still making any time at all for others. I have a newborn and it's tough managing everything and getting into a routine. I need my friends to know I am not a terrible or bad friend..I'm simply busy. It's different now and this is something I've wanted my whole life. Many of my close friends and even those friends on Facebook know that having kids does typically change you. I love being busy with all things baby related but having a phone makes it easier to connect. My good friend and wonderful hairdresser is one friend I have had to work had at keeping up the communication. I want her to know just because she doesn't have kids just yet doesn't mean I don't want to see her or include her in all things in my life. I love her dearly and can count on her to help me. Same with my friend with two young girls. She made it possible to be there the whole day I was in the hospital giving birth. 

Having a friend who has a child makes you a better friend in my eyes. For one those friends with kids are typically more patient. Hopefully they even know some CPR so they can help you out in a bind. Have you ever needed a bandaod? Ask a mom...it's sure to be in her purse. Also moms tend to carry snacks. (And if you are a Mormon like me and attend church for three hours every Sunday those snacks are great) Moms carry wipes and hand sanitizer usually and those things are the best inventions since sliced bread. ( especially in church where all of the kids want to touch your kid!) I challenge you to be friends with moms. Don't desert them! They will need adults to talk to. Especially if they have had a tough day because little Johnny was on the counter jumping off and causing a commotion. 

Mother's Day

I know now it's two days past Mother's Day but I still wanted to write about it. I am sitting here with my son sound asleep on my chest. He just was fed and burped and rocked to sleep. He has smiled at least twice in his sleep already. The cutest big squeezable cheeks and cutest dimples. I am so blessed by Heavenly Father it's hard to even fully express. While the week before was not the best I am grateful for time with loved ones. My great gram passed away at the age of 97. Born in 1918 this woman has seen so much history in her time. The final piece on the cake I feel like was meeting my little one when he was just three days old. 5 generations! I was able to be with her before she passed away and advocated for her care. She was a beautiful woman,mother,grandmother and person. I am lucky to have the memory of Seth meeting her. 

My mother is a beautiful woman as well. Inside and out. She was there for me when I was grieving and when I had to make tough decisions regarding my gram. She is there for me with my son and was there( and delivered Mathhew,our angel son) She worked 2 sometimes 3 jobs at a time to give us kids what we needed. She sacrificed so much for us and I would gladly do the same for my son now. 

They say once you have a child you learn what true unconditional love is. This is also the type of love we have from Heavenly Father. Which I am so grateful for. He taught us this example first and lets us feel it when we have our own children. I love unconditionally now and it's the best feeling in the world. 

Easter! And coincidences ❤️

Happy Easter to those who celebrate this wonderful day! Enjoy time with family and remember His sacrifices for all of us. 

On a different note ...I have honestly myself disliked the day for the last two years. I stopped thinking about Him and started thinking about how we lost our first son the day after Easter. And then this year my planned c section is actually tomorrow. Again falling on the day after Easter. It was until yesterday that I never stopped to think of the coincidence. There is a reason our Rainbow baby is coming the day after Easter. (Rainbow baby is a term used for the child born after a loss of a child previous) One of the ladies at church pointed this out to me and I was taken off guard. Well of course this means something! It means that Heavenly Father has not forgotten about me. He has known my struggle for years to conceive a healthy baby after the loss at 20 weeks previously. He has been walking along this journey with us. 

When I was first told I had to have my surgery the day after Easter I froze. Now today I am excited to finally hold another son of mine in my arms, and yes even in the day after Easter. Another coincidence is that I will be bringing Seth home on April 9th (pending I am healthy and he is healthy) that's the day we lost Seth back in 2012. That was the day we held our first son, and to be taking home our second son is so special. 

So just when things don't seem to go the way you planned please remember to look on the bright side. It's usually not the end and it may just take a wonderful Sister at church to remind you of the blessings. My sons have been able to meet in the Glory of God and play together before my second son came to us. And we will all be reunited one day externally. 

People that impact your life

So as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints I am lucky enough to be parked with what we call a visiting teacher. This person is paired with you and prayed for before pairing. I have sister Gardner and she is the best person. She has three adopted children with special needs and her husband has had his fair share of medical struggles along the way. He was recently in the hospital for over a month. Yet being pregnsnt(me this is) she kept checking in on me and made sure I was always ok. Friends encouraged her to start a go find me account. Of not familiar with this type of thing it's basically to help families reach a goal. Whether it's a trip for the family or in this case to help off set medical costs. This is the most deserving family and I know I have amazing readers who can help them. Please consider even just 10$ 

http://www.gofundme.com/helpforthegardners

Reflecting

So I have hd this pregnancy countdown app now on my phone for the last 28 or so weeks..shoot maybe even longer. I'm not going to lie being die in April had been worrying me most of the time. This April 9th marks 3 years since I gave birth to matthew who wasn't able to love (only being 20 weeks gestation) and he is now with Heavenly Father and my family members in Heaven. Last year I found out I was pregnant about the 13th or April and not even a week later it didn't take and I had a quick miscarriage. So when I found out I was pregnant and die in April I was so skeptical. But through the ability to recover priesthood blessings and prayers and lots of extra medical appointments to help calm my nerves we have made it to the final days of counting down. 

19,days or less is crazy to think about.  "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning."

James 1:17 

This verse ha been sticking out to me for sure over the course of this pregnancy. I am so beyond blessed. I know my husband feels the same way. He is so excited to have our second son in the way. 

Being LDS we believe families are forever and we can all be sealed to our family members. Even our first little guy Matthew. So I have to say at church is the one place where I have felt so comfortable when people ask me "how many kids do you have? Is this your first child?" And I can firmly answer this is my second child but our first is in Heaven. 

Hello world!

Been keeping busy lately with all things baby preparation. It's been a crazy blessing of a journey. Having the ability to get blessings and prayers has kept us humble and thanking Heavenly Father  continuously. I do feel bad though because I've honestly put up major walls with some friends and just not reached out to many. It has been nothing personal I have just been so nervous to do too much or have any crazy stress while pregnant. Some also still don't get why I changed my faith. And with limited patience while pregnant I avoid the religion n talk at times. Which for me is crazy. I love sharing my story and my faith. It's shaped who I am and who I want to be. I can not wait to have my son blessed at our Ward. (Specific church location) my grandpa is still a little confused as to why I keep telling him it's a blessing and not a baptism. He is a Roman Catholic. Which was the religion I was apart of most of my life. However I never grasped why I had to believe in original sin. Why are babies born sinners for Adam's mistake? My grandpa was gracious enough to listen to me and my thoughts. When I lost Matthew I was so worried in the hospital about getting a priest there to baptize him and give him his last rights. I was so worried about him getting into Heaven. I kind of chuckle now because there is no way Heavenly Father would send one of his children to me (and my amazing husband) and then have a tragedy happen and not accept him into Heaven. If anything ever happened to Seth I won't have to run around worrying about one last thing to do. He is automatically going to be with our Heavenly Father and his big brother.  Families can truly be together forever. My grandpa has his mother alive still while great grandpa passed about 6 years ago.  Grandpa has asked me how soon after his mom passes can she and my great grandpa be sealed together. This was so incredible to hear.  While not a member of our church he values the importance of these heavenly promises. 

I have about 28 days left until I will be induced at 39 weeks of pregnancy. I honestly didn't know if I would be able to have more children after losing Matthew. Not simply biologically but more so emotionally. Then last year I had a miscarriage. Albeit quick and painless compared to birthing a son who you know won't survive...it's possible that for the first time in three years the month of April can be giving us something positive ..our second son. Minds m of a funny story I will share.. Andrew and I were talking about how important it is to share with Seth about his older brother Matthew. And when asked how many siblings he hd he can chose his own answer. He can chose to include him in family drawings or just in conversations. My lovely husband...who if you ever met him you would know he is very quiet but when he speaks he is the smartest person and says the funniest things at times because well he just us a great sense of humor. He was worried about official forms that Seth will have to fill out. So I asked what he meant...he said well when Seth goes to college in Fall of 2033 he will need to fill out a FAFSA form.( it's basically for financial aide for college in order to get government help) I bust out laughing because my very analytical husband knew that on this form Matthews existence could not really count and he was worried about how we would all feel knowing this. I just smiled and said I would be totally fine. And I know in my heart I will be. Even is Seth never feels comfortable sharing to others and teachers about his angel in Heaven (because we all know the stigma miscarriage and stillbirth has) then that's his choice. But we as parents will know and honor him any way we can. 

Hidden moments

Just yesterday my town ,and surrounding counties got hit bad with snow. Snow days for nearly all school and even many job sites were closed down. I loved having another day off but was regretting to see who could help clear the snow. Andrew still had to work and by the time he would come home it's dinner then changing for his weekly fire department drill. So on a tight budget we decided to post in our neighborhoods facebook group and see if anyone could plow us out for 20$. He came and plowed and I saw him then leave to plow out the next driveway. As I was talking to a good missionary friend elder Fierros about life's blessings my husband told me the neighbor was pliwing people out for free. This was so humbling to know we have others who help when needed. I posted a big thank you in the facebook group and let him know that now Andrew could make it to any fire calls that may occur and he could then help others. 

It's been great livig in this neighborhood on and off in my lifetime. We moved into my Papa's home (grandpa) and have been making it our own now for a year and a half. But growing up I spent nearly every weekend at this home and in college lived there here while attending a local community college. As neighbors have come and gone the community has changed but we still manage to always bring in the best people. 

Just this summer during some garage sales we hit the jackpot at a neighbors home. We had my papa with us and he purchased a play house for us, as we were just about ready to open our home to respite foster children. The homeowner found out and said anything that didn't sell we were welcome to having. We gained many books, toys and even a train table that has somehow landed in our living room as a coffee table over these last several months. The kids love it and enjoy it all the time. My best friends daughters even get excited to use cars on it and play. We were so blessed to meet this neighbor and a few of the other ones this summer. I can't wait until this summer when I can push my son around and meet more of my wonderful neighbors. 

It's nice seeing everyone come together at many times of the year to help others.

One Year Mark

Wow Heavenly Father is so great!! I have been blogging now for a year and while there has been some spaces in between posts I have had some faithful readers come by every week and see what I have been posting. From the USA, to Canada, Germany, Romania, China, Australia and much more! I am so grateful that my words are reaching others.

So I am 7 months pregnant and somehow hurt my right knee about a month ago. I have been doing some water physical therapy and today I had the privilege of having this sweet older lady open up to me about her husband who is a Holocaust survivor. The things he went through are incredible. I have a degree in history with a focus on war and military strategy. I specifically like to study WWII and those who went through it. I also work (for fun) with many Genocide Survivors and Holocaust Survivors in learning their stories so I can then share them with others. I have held interviews and introduced many survivors who have spoken publicly. This was really special hearing his story today because it was a day to remember Martin Luther King Jr.  a man who has dedicated his short lived life to breaking down boundaries for African Americans and the walls of racism.

Life is short, so love one another. Try and have that Christ like love. Elder Kelly who has become one of my best missionary friends just shared this amazing scripture in his second to last email while on mission...

John 4:7-11......"7 Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God.

8 He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.

9 In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him.

10 Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another.

Also lets not touch on the fact that he will be going home soon... Even though he has been out of my area for almost  a year I have been blessed to have his family share his weekly emails with me, him be able to use Facebook for ways of connecting with those he has baptized and worked with, and share scriptures with. As well as be able to visit him in every area he has served in since leaving my area. He was there for so much and was the witness to our sealing last month. I am trying to convince him to come up and visit when Seth gets blessed in our church..so here is to hoping! 

Be prepared

So as I may or may not have mentioned before my husband is a volunteer firefighter for our town. This means a lot of sacrifice with family time and just his personal time in general. Which we really would not have it any other way. Well on January 1st just before midnight his pager was beginning to go crazy. He luckily always tells me his calls as he is exiting the home, and this time it was a huge church fire at a local Catholic church not to far from where we live. Since it was a live fire I was also called out to help as part of the ladies auxiliary. This was my first time at a fire scene and I will never forget it. The smell of the smoke that stayed in my clothes, to the priest having this look of defeat on his face. There were so many great volunteers of firefighters that they were able to contain the fire so it did not reach the altar. Which is a true blessing because the Eucharist (sacrament) is kept in a tabernacle and golden container usually somewhere on the altar.
With dozens on the scene and many of our firefighters being members of this church it was really hard to see. They worked hard to contain the fire and minimize damage but they will really have to rebuild and with it being the first day of the new year it was heart breaking to see.

This made me really think about getting my butt moving on making a 72 hour kit....what is this you say? Well its a kit that has things you will need in case of an emergency and you tend to get enough supplies for 72 hours. Our church had members also teach us on a lesson involving a binder or something with all of your important documents you can grab in case of an emergency.

Its best to know what is in your house for insurance purposes and to have said insurance! The church will rebuild and become even stronger. Andrew has been stopped in public and thanked for him helping out. He has been humbled to know he was able to help, and just loves knowing he makes a difference.